When I train the mental focus starts a few hours before I hit the gym. Thinking about what I'm training , doing a mental check to make sure I'm dialed, got all gear and food ready and eaten.Then of course what I'm wearing. It really depends on the weather. I want to make sure I always break a brutal sweat. I am very conscious of all these damn medications I'm forced to take to live. So the wife gets home I hop in the car and I usually put my favorite training music in "Slipknot". 9 guys all about my age, the music they play sings to my rage. When this goes in I feel a level of rage that starts at a 5 and by the time I hit the gym its a 10 !!!
I step across the threshold of my local gym and sign in at the front desk. I speak to know one I am here to train not talk. I hop on the scale this week I'm sitting on 215. The its to the first exercise, lets work with back. Basic warm up,chins and deckers. Sets of 20 slow and concentrating on contracting the lats.
Rows are the first big daddy set. I chalk up, step into the rack, strap in and pause, I close my eyes and let the music pull the rage from my soul. I can feel it bleeding from the inside out. It encompasses me and turns my aura into a pulsing flaming forge. As my eyes open I feel the rage burning and fueling my muscles to the point of ripping the muscle from bone. The fires there I stand up and back I assume proper form and explode through each rep. Its not pretty I make noise but do my best not to scream as I push myself to the point of complete furry. The last rep says no, I say yes, its sloppy,ugly and on purpose.
When I train I do not take it easy, I'm in there to decimate my muscles and burn the rage from my tortured soul. My rage is constantly fueled by the stupid sh#t I see. Crappy trainers,people thinking that this is a hang out of some sort, I am here to train. I talk only out of cortecy and save whatever I have to say till I'm done.
Its really hard to describe the level of rage that I possess in the gym. My shrink would say its started with the divorce of my parents when I was 2. I think that plays a part but having the ever loving shit kicked out of you everyday all through school would make you mad to.
I hate bullies. Especially ones that beat woman. I have more than once stepped in and clock a punk that thought he was tough beaten on a ladie. I have also stepped in for some gentlemen that were being bullied. I love it when a big 300 boy tries to intermediate me in the gym to get off a piece of equipment. Last guy that tried it didn't think it was funny when I said don't matter how big you are, might beat my ass once but that why we make guns. plus when training its real easy to walk by and kick a knee or drop a plate on your head. Course there was 3 but that's OK good odds for me.
I see being a bad ass this way, you don't know your limits and what you can take till you've been beaten at least a half dozen times. I've had mine kicked couple a hundred.I then smiled and the punk walked off.Didn't think the litle guy would have no problem smokin him.
Reminds me of a time in the gym right after my heart attacks that I was trying put up 80 lb. dumbbells on the military press. Half way up I blacked out. woke up with the dumbbell rebounding off the ground in right into my jaw. Took me 3 tries but I got up shook it off and finished the workout. Wife didn't believe me till she felt the chunk broken off from my jaw floating around.
So to conclude, training is something that has so many benefit's for me. Working out the rage, helps me focus my mind, you have couple hundred pounds over your face and see what you think of, and satisfies my need to constantly improve myself. I started at 6'1 135 pds. and have grown into 215 of solid muscle. You can do it, make your goals short and long always strive to do better, screw what other people think!! Your goals!! Your soul!!
Never retreat Never surrender!
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